I Promised Cat Pictures

Horror story or not? Cat looks pretty happy to me, but what is the tragic end to this story?

Dracul Not Dracula! Get This Straight.

                         Do you know how hard it is to get an image of the novel, Dracul?  No matter how many times I searched for Dracul images, only Dracula pictures showed up. I imagine the author, Dracre Stoker, great grand nephew of Bram Stoker, has to wrestle with this a lot, explaining that Dracul and Dracula are not one and the same.

And they're not. The author explains that his book is more in line with what Bram Stoker wanted printed, that the elder Stoker had more than 100 pages cut by his publisher. Of course, it would be hard to know what Bram Stoker did or didn't want, being that he's not around to tell us. (Or is he?) If we take the younger Stoker's word, then we would believe Bram was warning us that vampires exist. Do we want to believe this? I, for one, can handle horror better if I don't think vampires will drill into my neck or zombies eat my brains. Maybe the fear of believing it is true is what appeals to some readers. To each their own.

Poor Bram Stoker. In a recent novel I read, Stoker's Wilde, when little Bram was dying at age seven, it was the vampire and actor, Henry Irving who bit him and saved his life. Later, he gave him a job at the Lyceum Theatre, proving to be a friend for life. In Dracul, it's little Bram's nanny, who bites him and saves his life. Goodness, vampires were lining up to save the child. I guess they really wanted their story told, although it seems authors, including me, have gone hog wild with vampires.

Dracul is an adventurous read. A good time was had by all, except when they were dying, getting ripped apart, or having their blood sucked out. But hey, isn't that what a good vampire book is all about?                                                                    

Johannes Cabal the Necromancer.

This is one of my favorite humor horror novels. A bit twisted, a bit unexpected. I just read it again after several years. I'd forgotten that it's also sad because Johannes Cabal is so lonely. But, how can he not be lonely? He's despicable. But, a genius. His brother, Horst, is smart, charming, strong, handsome and a good dresser. Why do all the good ones have to be vampires. Hell, have you ever tried dating a vampire? It's a draining experience.

The author, Jonathon L. Howard, says he got the idea from Ray Bradbury's Something Wicked This Way Comes, which we all know and love. Where does an evil carnival come from? Howard found the spot where the devil parks his carnival.

Hey producers, need an idea for a movie or streaming show? How about Johannes Cabal and his good-looking (though dead) brother?

Cover Reveal for Arterial Bloom

The cover for the horror anthology coming out in February 2020. My short story, Kudzu Stories will be included. Published by Crystal Lake Publishing. Exciting!

Arterial Bloom. For lots of screams, look for it. February 2020.

How to Make Readers Like Creepy Characters

I said I'd give an occasional writing tip and here goes. Above is one of my all time favorite funny horror novels, Johannes Cabal the Necromancer, by Jonathon L. Howard. Johannes Cabal is one of the most awful protagonists you'll ever find, but he's so freaking likable in his awfulness. He's not kind, he's not good, he's not particularly honest, and has been run out of towns by crowds carrying pitchforks. In The Necromancer he has to convince 100 people to sell their souls to the devil so Cabal can get his own soul back. He has no scruples. He'll take anybody's soul with only his brother, Horst, keeping him  anything close to moral. "No children!"

Why do readers like this creep? Why do they like Sherlock Holmes? He isn't friendly, kind, loving, or nice, either. There are two ways to make an unlikable protagonist appeal to readers. (Okay, I think there is a third which is to make him or her funny, but that wouldn't apply to Holmes because he's not a barrel of laughs. Cabal is hilarious, though.)

The two ways writers make unpalatable characters appealing is A) Make them brilliant at what they do. If he/she isn't good, make them more outstanding than anyone else in their field. This applies to both Cabal and Holmes.  B) Make someone we like, fond of the protagonist. Holmes isn't likable, but Dr.Watson is. We like Dr. Watson and whatever he likes, we like.  Therefore, we like Holmes.

The same holds true for Johannes Cabal. He's funny and brilliant, but nasty. He's even nasty to his brother, Horst.  For some reason, Horst still has fraternal feelings toward Johannes even though Johannes did about the worst thing he could do to his brother. We don't just like Horst, we (at least in my case) adore Horst. He's smart, he's strong, he's moral, he's kind, he's handsome, and an outstanding dresser even though he's dead. Despite all this, he's still willing to help his rotten brother. If Horst likes Johannes, there must be something likable about him.

To sum it up, if you have an icky protagonist, make him or her brilliant and make an approachable character like him or her.

No Sasquatch Romance Here

Well, I'm disappointed.  I thought Sasquatch, Love, and Other Imaginary Things would be some kind of romance with Bigfoot. No, I'm not weird or anything! People are all kissy face with vampires, zombies, ghosts, and werewolves. Why not Sasquatch? It would have been more interesting than the romance between these blah teenagers. Honestly, how many times can characters smirk and bite their lips? Too many YA novels have their protagonists smirking and biting their lips all through the book. Nobody really does this! Have some imagination, people.

People Look At Me and Say This

Yes, yes you do.

Pretty Little Dead Girls

Lately I've binge read Mercedes Yardley, just lately finishing Pretty Little Dead Girls. Something I appreciate in horror is humor. I'm not much into guts spewing, but if you spew your guts because you're laughing, that's all right by me.

Pretty Little Dead Girls' subtitle is A Novel of Murder and Whimsey. And it is. In the last novel of Ms. Yardley's that I read, Apocalypse Montessa and Nuclear Lu, it was hard to like any of the characters. It was wonderfully written, but even though the protagonists were damaged in childhood, it's hard to get on the side of serial killers.

The opposite happens in Pretty Little Dead Girls. It's so easy to make good, kind characters mushy, but Ms. Yardley has a real talent for making characters likeable without becoming treacle. Even questionable characters are changed for the better by Bryony, the young lady destined to be murdered. She's sweet, but she's not a Pollyanna.

The desert Southwest is a character, too, screaming and creeping to Bryony's father's door, desiring to get its deserty hands on his daughter.

The serial killer is rotten and that's how it should be. Of course, the killings aren't funny, but there are lots of fun bits, a real relief when there is horror all around.

The Memory Police

Some of us read horror because we like to be afraid. Some of us (not mentioning who) read horror because something is slightly "off." I like it because, frankly, my real life is kind of boring.

A book I liked got a lot of press for being literary, but seemed to be ignored by the dark fiction reviewers. Maybe I just missed it, but I thought this would appeal to horror readers. It's The Memory Police by Yoko Ogawa. What could be more scary than being hauled off by "memory police" just for being normal?

On an island, things disappear. Not like they're lost. People wake up one morning, realize there are no more ribbons, and in mass they bring all ribbons to public places to be burned. When they wake up to realize all roses have disappeared, the entire town brings their roses and throws them in the river. One day it's birds. Another day they wake up to find books have disappeared so they bring all books to be burned and finally burn down the library.

To make things creepier, if a person hides something, for sentimental reasons or because they like it, if the memory police find out (and they do because they search houses) the owner is arrested and "disappeared."

Are things really disappearing? Or has the entire population gone mad? Or is this a hint of what a police state is like?

Don't take the chance of having books disappear! Read it now!

Excellent News

My flash fiction story, Thelma Takes the Devil, won first prize in Crystal Lake Publishing Halloween-themed contest. I'm really extra happy because this story was voted on and chosen by the subscribers of Crystal Lake's Patreon page. It's good to know somebody besides my mother likes my writing. It's kind of hard to know what Mama thinks since she's dead, but I'm sure she'd like my stories. I think. She might just think they're weird.

Yes, now that I think about it, she probably would think my writing was weird.

There's an interview with me coming up soon. I'll let you know when that appears.

Here's another cat photo because I promised. The cat is the one in the foreground. Her name is Sophie.

Disgruntled Cat

Disgruntled Cat:  She says she writes, but I don't see a thing that says Linda J. Marshall.

Answer: That's because it's still coming. Short horror story, Kudzu Stories, in Arterial Bloom in February and Thelma Takes the Devil in Shallow Waters, date to be announced. Both from Crystal Lake Publishing, a many-time Stoker award winner for best in horror and great people to work with.

What Killed Bram Stoker?

Failed to mention that in Stoker's Wilde, the storyline keeps pointing out that Stoker is a real straight arrow, always wanting to do the proper, middle-class thing, like vampire hunting. (A brief affair, in the book, with the actress Ellen Terry--very brief because he wasn't that sort of guy.)  I didn't know much about the real Stoker so I looked him up...in a séance.  No, not really. I googled him up like everybody else. He died of syphilis, folks. This straight arrow died of a sexually transmitted disease. Of course, a lot of people died of it before penicillin, but still... And, he was in the theater business and theater people have a reputation, whether deserved or not. But, syphilis. A sad way to die. I wish he'd been bitten by a vampire instead and was still around writing books. Hey, that's a good idea for a novel. Or a short story. Or a blog post.

Stoker's Wilde

Okay, so I said I would do some reviews so here we go. I just finished Stoker's Wilde by Melissa Prusi and Steven Hopstaken, published by Flame Tree Press. I'm a huge fan of Oscar Wilde, and Oh my God, his The Importance of Being Ernest is so funny I snorted with laughter while reading it. I have to read alone because snorting...  Being a admirer of Wilde, I was anxious to read Stoker's Wilde. Bram Stoker and Oscar Wilde, though they hate each other, become vampire hunters because, if you read a lot of Victorian horror, you realize everybody from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt were vampire hunters, so why not authors too? Sometimes I think I'm the only one left who is not a vampire hunter. Of course, I'm not a Victorian either, only in my heart.

Prusi and Hopstaken wrote a book that made me keep turning the pages. Their Wilde was not quite as witty as the real Wilde, but who could top him? He was one-of-a-kind. Of course, even in real life Wilde couldn't always be witty. That would be exhausting.

The writers did include a short play written by the fictitious Wilde. It wasn't nearly as good as his real plays. They saved themselves by having him write something along the lines of "This is drivel," at the end of the play. And it was.

Even if their Oscar wasn't making my eyes water with laughter, it was a rollicking read if you're into Victorian vampire hunters. And, who isn't?

Flame Tree is coming out soon with a sequel where Bram and Oscar hunt vampires in America, called Stoker's Wilde West. Looking forward to it because, we all know, there are some real bloodsuckers out West. Yikes! I live in the West. Oh no!